Number 5: When someone stops 10-15 feet away from the car in front of them at a red light.
-WHY? I don’t at all understand why people do this and I’ve allowed myself to lose sleep over coming up with a reason. Is it because you saw a red light so you just stopped where you were and started playing with your phone? Did you leave 15 feet in the event that the car behind you somehow didn’t realize the light was red and you have room to move up so you don’t get hit? If you do this please for the love of God explain why.
Number 4: People that NEVER signal
-This drives me fucking mental. When I approach a stop sign and the driver in the opposite lane at their stop sign doesn’t have their signal on of course I’m going to assume they’re going straight, but of course this isn’t always the case. In fact, assuming anything while driving is a bad idea. There are so many ignorant morons on the road that make driving frustrating. Really is it that fucking hard to flick your wrist to turn a goddamn signal on?
Number 3: Those family decals
-I fucking HATE these with such an intense passion. Have you ever stopped to think that I don’t give a fuck about your family? What happens when your dog dies? Or what happens when your husband leaves you because you put stupid decals on the van? What if your kid is retarded? Are there Down Syndrome stickers? This fad is one of the stupidest I’ve seen since everyone wore those “Cat in the Hat” hats in 1996.
Number 2: Constant lane changers.
-Jerry Seinfeld refers to these people as “Constantly re-evaluating their lane choice,” but I call them douche bags. We’ve all seen these assholes and if you haven’t them guess what? You’re one of those assholes. These morons weave in and out of traffic on the highway putting people in danger only to reach their destination 5 minutes sooner. Then they do this on main streets and all they accomplish is reaching the next red light first. You’re a moron and you don’t belong on the road.
Number 1: People riding their bikes on major streets like Yonge and Bathurst.
-These people are the lowest form of human life. Ok that might be a stretch. It goes Pedophiles, rapists then these dickheads on their bikes, then murderers. Why MUST you ride on streets with a speed limit of 60KM or faster? What’s wrong with using side streets that have far less traffic than major roads? Is the pavement used on Yonge Street from a distant magical world? Was the road paved by fairies that grant wishes to those who ride their bikes on it? Does it feel like riding on a cloud? NO it fucking doesn’t! Pavement is pavement and a road is a road. Why in the fuck should I have to be extra cautious while passing you while driving 70KMs on Bathurst? I already have to look out for the other shit drivers on the road and by that I of course mean women and Asians. Just kidding ladies, but not really. Get the fuck off major roads and stick with side streets. There is NO difference between the two! Have some common sense! You’re not a superstar, you’re not training for the Tour De France and you’re never going to be in the Olympics. If you want to ride your bike on major roads so fucking badly then get a motorcycle and ride without a helmet so we can rid you of this world. A bit too far? Maybe. Oh and by the way dickheads, if you’re riding on the road you have to stop at stop signs too! Fucking pricks
Well that’s my 5 cents. Thanks for not reading.